Chapter 7 

By the end of the week I had moved my few possessions to a tiny house that was closer to The Vine but also right on the edge of the bush so that if someone wanted to visit and not be seen, it was easy to slip in and out unnoticed. The house belonged to one of the Lloyds and Tom told me there were ‘friends’ living in the neighbouring house, so I needn’t worry. I was still looking over my shoulder a lot, wondering if the police were really following me or if I was just being paranoid. 

Aaron came in on Wednesday night; he looked his usual flashy self in his white shirt and trousers tucked into his boots. The weather had turned quite cool but he never seemed to wear a coat, I guess he spent a lot of time outside and was used to the cold.  

“How are you Eileen?” he greeted me with his usual smile but seemed a bit flat somehow. “I’ve come to drown my sorrows tonight – the engagement with Kate is off and Mrs Byrne doesn’t want to know me anymore.” I looked at him sharply, was he playing clever games with me? “In fact she’s taking me to court over that damn horse Charlie – he was a present to Kate and I had every right to take him when she broke off the engagement!” And he proceeded to tell me the long and twisted story of how he had given Kate a filly that had then been exchanged for said Charlie that he had taken and for his part sold on to Maggie Skillion, Ned Kelly’s sister, and how Mrs Byrne was now taking him to court because of it. “I will never understand women!” he complained as he pushed his glass towards me for a refill.  

“Aaron, did you tell the coppers about Joe and me?” I just blurted it out, I wanted to see his reaction.  

He looked at me, clearly confused. “Why would I?  I only tell them things that won’t do any harm, you know, things to keep them busy like and out of the way.” He looked me in the eye. “Joe is my mate and you are his girl – the coppers have no more business with that than I do.”  

I looked at him grimly. “Somebody told them, that Constable Jackson came here on Monday, asking me questions.”  

Aaron took my hand. “Eileen, I swear to you I have not said anything about you and Joe to the coppers.” His gaze was unwavering and for once, I did believe him. But if he hadn’t talked to the coppers, who had? I started looking suspiciously at all the people who came to the bar after that, wondering. 

Saturday night Mary was working with me again.  

“How’s that handsome outlaw of yours then?” she asked when we were getting ready to close for the night. “You know, Kate at The Hibernian was asking me questions about you last week. I don’t think she’s happy about Joe not coming round anymore… I’m not surprised, she’s got quite a temper on her that one and I think Joe got wise to her pretty quick! Anyway, I wouldn’t put it past her to do you some mischief, so just be on your guard.”  

I looked at Mary. “She’s not friendly with coppers, is she?” I asked, already guessing the answer.  

“Oh, she’s not picky that one – “ Mary rolled her eyes “I think that new constable is her particular favourite, saw her making eyes at him and whispering to him when he was leaving.” I had my answer then. I felt oddly relieved as I set off for my walk home. 

My heart started to beat faster when I saw the thin sliver of light from under my door as I stepped up to it. Joe. I opened the door and there he was, pulling me into his arms as the door closed behind me and I just held on tight. There was no need to say anything as his lips found mine and his body pressed me against the door. I could feel his need against my hip and my fingers were fumbling to undo all the buttons to get the clothes out of the way.  He managed to pull my dress down far enough to expose my breasts, and when his thumbs brushed over them, I buried my fingers in his hair. I needed him to love me, to feel that connection between us again.  

“Here lass?” he whispered against my mouth as his fingers pulled the pins out of my hair, letting it fall down to my naked shoulders.  

“Yes!” I felt wild and wanton. He lifted me up and his strong arms held me, my back against the door as I wound my legs around him. Everything else was forgotten as we claimed each other, desperate to be together again. 

In the morning I woke up to the sound of rain coming down hard outside. My cheek was against Joe’s chest and his arms were around me, holding me to him, and for the first time in weeks I felt truly happy. I knew he would leave again soon but for now he was here and that was all I cared about. I didn’t want to disturb his sleep so I lay there quietly, listening to his even breathing and the steady beat of his heart. When I had collapsed into his arms after the edge of our passion was spent, he had carried me to the bed and we had loved each other again and again, by silent agreement leaving the talking till later.  

Joe moved and I lifted my head to see his smiling eyes.  

“Good morning Eileen. Sleep well?” He pulled me on top of him and gave me a kiss, his hands gently sliding along my back and desire flooded my body again.  

“How hungry are you Joe?” I asked, shifting myself slightly when I felt him stir under me.  

He grinned. “Breakfast can wait lass.” His lips captured mine and we were lost to the world again. 

“I have to get up and light the fire Joe,” I said a good while later when we lay there, our arms around each other, listening to the rain.  

He brushed the hair out of my face gently and kissed my cheek. “You stay right there lass. I’ll do it.” He got up and tucked the blanket around me. “So far I haven’t done much for you have I, except bring you trouble.” There was a shadow in his eyes and even though I didn’t want to spoil the mood, I knew it was time for us both to face some truths.  

“Joe, you know I don’t care about all that. I just need to know…” I swallowed and watched him walk over to the stove and light it. He was completely unselfconscious of his nakedness, comfortable in his body and the space it occupied in the world. He poured water into the kettle and put it on the stove to boil and turned back to me.  

“About the opium?”  

I nodded. He walked over to me and sat down on the bed. “I’m not sure if I can explain it to you lass… Sometimes my head gets too full of things and I cannot see straight. The opium helps me let go, just be… And with what’s been going on lately – well, I seem to need it more than before.” He brushed his fingers across my cheek. “You do the same for me Eileen, you let me just be, like no one else does.”  

I closed my eyes briefly before I asked him what had been on my mind for a while. “Aaron said you are his mate and I am your girl – is that how you think of me too?”  

I held my breath waiting for his answer, searching his eyes that now looked straight into mine. His thumb brushed along my lips and then he smiled and said: “Yes, you are my girl Eileen.”  

It felt good to hear him say it and yet I couldn’t stop there. “Then why is it not enough for you Joe?”  

He pulled me into his arms then and spoke against my hair. “I don’t know lass, I wish it could be… You are beautiful, so strong and calm and I do need you.”  

I knew that was the most he could give me and if I wanted him in my life, I would have to accept it. “I need you too Joe. And I need you to be safe.”  

He pulled away to look at me. “I am safe.”  

I took a deep breath. “And what about what Aaron is doing? Do you really trust him to keep you safe?”  

A brief flicker of irritation passed across Joe’s face. “Aaron is my mate, we’ve known each other forever. I know Tom thinks Aaron told the coppers about me visiting you but I don’t believe it.” There was a note of annoyance in his voice. 

The water was boiling now, steam rising up in the air and Joe got up to prepare the tea.  

“It wasn’t Aaron, Joe.” He turned around to look at me and I could see he was surprised. “I didn’t really think so anyway but I asked him just the same, and I believed him when he said it wasn’t him. And now I know who it was.” Was that relief on his face?  

“Who was it, lass?”  

I kept my eyes on his. “Kate from The Hibernian.”  

He looked slightly guilty at that. “I’m sorry Eileen. That was before I met you, I haven’t been… I was at The Hibernian last week and she got upset when I left early. I’m sorry she caused all that trouble for you.”  

That did make me feel better and I smiled. “I don’t think that copper will be too happy with her for sending him to The Vine, I don’t think he appreciated the welcome we gave him.” And I told him what had happened.  

“That’s my girl!” Joe was smiling again as he bent down to give me a kiss. “And don’t worry about Aaron, he really is on our side. Enough talking, time for breakfast.” He moved the little table next to the bed and there we sat, wrapped in a worn blanket, eating dry bread with jam and drinking scalding hot tea and it was the best breakfast I had ever had.