 banner by Krazymoonkat Part Two Now this isn’t quite how I was expecting it to tell the truth, alright so I wasn’t thinking so much at all - but she had seemed at least a little sad to see me go. Maybes the Lass has a fella waiting at home? Aye, even kiddies and all. And maybe the last thing she wants is some outlaw turning up at her door- especially one she hasn’t set eyes on in a few decades. Sure that might explain why she has been hiding. Once I saw her in that bar I got it in my head how she might not be pleased at all. I shouldn’t ha’ come, not really, she asked me not to, but I had to, just the once more before…well… things are worse now. It’s cold in the Ranges, seems the seasons turned against us too, and we can't do nothin' about it except run and hide and freeze our fuckin’ balls off. Ah the weather is the least of it. Things have gone to shit. Aaron, him and his whole family are in with the traps, and it’s like being stuck. Just waiting for one of us to be caught. Waiting for Ned to decide where we will jump to next and waiting for the coppers to get closer. Always bloody waiting. Well I can’t stand it, I wonder whether it wouldn’t better to get me head blown off right now than all this! All this time we have just wasted sitting there in the bastard cold and hating each other for it not being different. And I thought- I am fucked if I am sitting here again today. Eva will know, she knows what happens to us, to me, and she will understand that I can’t just sit there waiting fer that bullet aswell. Jesus Christ, it fills up me mind now. The whiskey hardly even touches me; there is never enough whiskey.. Of course I could have just gone up to the bar, ha, the one she works at that is, I’d rather not think on the Glenrowan Inn right now. I could ha' gone up to her, a “How do you do Eva? Remember me?” but I figured there was some reason that she was pretending like I wasn’t there. She is older that’s for sure, though on the ride down from Jerilderie it came into me mind to get a newspaper to see just how much. For all I knew she would have been long dead and me be chasing some comfort in a graveyard. Sure I’ll have one of me own soon enough. Instead, there she was and looking younger than I thought from the years that had passed. I suppose all these folk do- something to be said for having plenty eh? So I passed the time considerin' me situation, talking all friendly to another lass, but watching Eva ducking behind the bar and wondering what the hell I was doing here after all. It didn’t seem so easy now, seeing her like that, wondering how the years might have changed me too, given the chance. Maybe I should have left her in peace, walked away. That other lass seemed willing enough to take me mind off me troubles with all her smiles and the way she touched me as if she didn’t mean to, giggling and flashing her eyes at me. But instead, here I am out in this alley with Eva who looks like she would rather be in the company of Fitzpatrick than me. Christ. Maybe I just had too much of that black stuff eh? Going to wake up in a minute or two from this bad dream and find Ned snoring like a pig next to me. Aye well on that note I will try a bit harder then… Still at least she is peering out the side of her hands now. Shit, I think she is going to cry. Nice one Joe. Not exactly the tearful reunion I had in mind that’s for sure. She likes talking, perhaps I should explain some? Well that’s if I can. “Perhaps I shouldn’t ha come. I wasn’t even sure it would work, or whether I would still be able to find yer” Best get this over eh? “Nor as it happens whether you would want to see me any ways” Well don’t rush to answer now. “Joe…Fuck of course I do! It is a bit of a shock...” That’s a bit more like it eh? Will slide down the wall next to her and sit in the dirt. Like old times wouldn’t you say? Ah maybe not... I’ll try a grin; see if that snaps her out of it “You’re looking grand!” Christ her body just went stiff as an old post. “For an old woman you mean?” “Are sure you aren’t! You don’t look at all like…” Fuck shut up Joe yer stupid bugger. Oh you’ve a way with the women alright, I can see this one coming up fast. “Your mother?” “I didn’t mean that…I didn’t mean that- you look grand.” Come on back to me; give us a smile will yer? "But I saw you Joe, in the bar with that woman” “Eva…Jesus! I was just talking to her- well you know exactly what was going on since you was watching every move!” So, now she is staring at me again but well I’ve not a mind to let that go “Aye well perhaps I shouldha' gone back with her, but instead of that I am sitting here with you in the alley in the dark, and there’s not so much of a ‘welcome back Joe! Glad to see you are still alive Joe!’ neither. No you didn’t even want to talk to me, make yer mind up Eva...you want me to go?” Fuck, maybe I really should have thought about this a bit more eh? Oh Eva. Don’t look at me like that. I don't know why I've upset yer by coming, but I hadn't a mind to “Look I am sorry, Lass stop crying again now, I didn’t mean it, and look I came to find you. I came to find yer didn’t I? Will yer let me explain- will we go somewhere? Out of this stinkin' place. Come on, Eva. Christ I am sorry” |